I hate you

I hate you
Even when i'm not with you
You make me cry
Even when i drive
Your word stays in me
Everytime you spoke to me
I don't like you
Simply because i hate you

I just cried when i drove to fetch sis from office. Never had i did this before but i just can't stand it. Drops of tears just flow like rushing river. Normally i like to cry when i'm hurt and sad, alone in the room hugging my pillow. It's a good way to release myself. Now i feel better after i cried but i can't imagine i did it when i'm driving. Even little girl from other car saw it and looking at me curiously.. ;)

About what? About the one that i hate very much. He called when i'm taking my nap. Telling me a lot of things i don't like to hear. Leaving back echo of voices in my mind that i can't delete, in my sleep till i release it just now. That's why my family don't like to pick up house phone, simple because we don't want to listen to him speak.

Lord, help me, help me. I hate him much but i know i should not. Help me to forgive and forget, what he has done in my life. Lord, i hate him, very much. I'm sorry Lord, help me to forgive, my dad.

You call me crazy?

Am i really crazy? Or it's really out of love?

JG, one of the uitmer was admitted in the hospital because of dengue fever. I really pity him when i visited him in Klang GH, with all the beds lying around disorderly. But having heard that he was transfered to a private hospital later so that he can have good rest to do his last final paper in the hospital, i feel better.

And he was suppose to discharge himself after the exam and take bus to KL bus station to exchange bus back to BP, his hometown, i begin to worried again. How can a sick person with fever and without strength taking bus all the way from Klang to KL??

I just can't stand it i told him i will pick him up today.

Then i started to worried because i don't even know the way to that private hospital in klang and dont know the way to KL (ya ya, laugh... i'm shah alam gal, not kl gal). So i search the internet for map but couldn't find map for both the directions. So i called LT and she gave me perfect directions.

Still, knowing me, i actually went out to did a search driving out to Klang and KL from 11.15pm to 2.15am this morning, following the direction from LT just to find the way so that i won't lost my way when i'm fetching a patient in my car. =) (**You call me crazy??**) hahahahahaaa

Really thank God that the ways are quite easy to find eventhough i'm lost twice, but well, now i can go back to the place perfectly.

So this morning, i pick up EL who just came back from Ireland for holiday to go with me and we picked JG up, wow, i'm surprised that he looks better today, so we went for lunch first before sending him to KL. Everything went perfectly fine, praise the Lord. =)

Bad Day by Daniel Powter

**I'm falling in love with this song. Thanks to my darling who got this song for me to put in my blog**

Where is the moment when we need it the most
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost
They tell me your blue sky's faded to grey
They tell me your passion's gone away
And I don't need no carrying on

You stand in the line just to hit a new low
You're faking a smile with the coffee to go
You tell me your life's been way off line
You're falling to pieces every time
And I don't need no carrying on

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Well you need a blue sky holiday
The point is they laugh at what you say
And I don't need no carrying on

You had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
The camera don't lie
You're coming back down and you really don't mind
You had a bad day

Sometimes the system goes on the blink and the whole thing it turns out
Wrong
You might not make it back and you know that you could be well oh that
Strong
Well I'm not wrong

So where is the passion when you need it the most
Oh you and I
You kick up the leaves and the magic is lost

Cause you had a bad day
You're taking one down
You sing a sad song just to turn it around
You say you don't know
You tell me don't lie
You work at a smile and you go for a ride
You had a bad day
You see what you like
And how does it feel, one more time
You had a bad day
You had a bad day
You had a bad day

Great lesson

Always forget to blog this down and it happened 2 weeks ago during the down time of streamyx so i can't blog during that time.

I will always remember what i learned from CW, my diving instructor. We went out for mamak and I drove my new car to show him.

CW: Beckz, you know what is the car that i like the most?
Beckz: What car?!?! *with great eagerness to hear*
CW: It is the car that i'm afford to pay.

This is something that i need to learn. To be contented. Not that i'm not satisfied with my car now, but if people were to asked me what is the car that i like the most, i will definitely answer, BMW.

2nd chance

Everyone deserve 2nd chance, this including my mom. Dl and i bought her a brand new Nokia 6030 3 months ago but after using for 2 weeks, she dumped the hp into the washing machine accidentally. There goes our hard-earn-income.

Pic 1: The old box - 3 months old & the new box - bought today

Well, being a daughter and seeing how regretful she was and how bad is her old hp's condition, finally i have decided to get her another one after thinking for 3 months.

Bought her the same model since she like it very much. Gave her in a surprise way, bro and i changed the hp, putting in her sim card in the new hp while she was taking her shower after work, then i purposely call her hp and told her that her hp is ringing, she said is not her's, is bro's. Then i called 2nd time and said is her hp that is ringing, she was so surprise and said she nearly tears. Hahhaaha... and keep on thanking me for it.

Even the sales lady who is working in the Nokia shop said don't throw it in the water again. Hahah.. hopefully no 2nd time!

Pic 2: Nokia 6030

Well, i'm happy to see my mom happy. Thank God for the cash.

An eye-opener

My ex-housemate, Anita came down from Indonesia, so me & another ex-housemate, Christine from Kuantan went to stay a night in Genting. Very expensive room with a room as small as a queen-size bed and a toilet only!!!

We only had 16 hours in Genting, reach Genting at 10 pm and the next day, at 2 pm, we took the bus down to KL already. Most of the time is travelling time.

But the attraction this time in Genting was the CASINO! Yes, i went to the casino, of course not to gamble, i don't gamble, and it's really an eye-opener for me to be there. Before i stepped into the casino, i was being stopped by the police, hehehee... he asked for my IC **said i don't look like i'm adult**. x)

Christine was attracted by one type of game at the casino so she was standing there and refuse to walk, well, Anita and i walked around, being a new person in the casino, everything looks cool to me, every games at the casino is something new to me, i don't even know what they are playing.

Things i noticed what i'm at the casino:
1. Those workers (banker) looked so professionally trained in their work.
2. Place for "OLD" people to exercising their fingers!!!! What i mean? Goshhh... So many old man and woman sitting at the 'tiger machine' (don't really call what) just poking the buttons, i don't know what they are playing but it's just rubbish, i'm not sure whether they know what they are playing or not...
3. Baby sitting place - place for children to put their old parents there. Their children will be gambling at the casino and their old parents will be sitting at the 'tiger machine' passing their time & exercising their fingers.
4. People just gamble like throwing their money in the river! I saw people just throwing out RM500 at a time to gamble again and again, man........... *speechless*

Conclusion:-
I want to open a casino too, because is the world's fastest earning place! It's a place for silly people to throw their money and smart people to earn their money!

Jokes:-
I was telling Christine and Anita that let us do a survey with the people at Genting asking them this question, "How much you lose in the casino today?", it's for our calculation to calculate how much profits we can earn when we open a casino. And i was doing the act of poking the machines all the time in Genting, man... it's really an eye-opener to me.

Pic 1: Candid by Christine, only had 3 hours sleep only... kekekee

Pic 2: Anita just touched down, in KL Sentral waiting for bus to Genting.

Pic 3: Big football

Pic 4: The resort that we stayed, "The ugliest resort," once commented by a preacher because too colourful, heheheheee....

Pic 5: I did not take a lot of pics this time and i'm being banned by Christine to post her pics up, hehee... yes Christine? =)

Busy as a bee

Ever since streamyx is up again, i have been working non-stop. No time to even blog. Hhhmm... I hope the business will get better as days to come. Thank you Lord.

Today i used 2 hours to travel to kl sentral just to get genting bus tickets, queuing up for like 1 min and get my bus tickets within 1 min and then travel back to shah alam. Am i silly? hahahaa... This month i have used a lot of cash. I hope next month i can save some.

Alright, that's all for now, want to sleep early and wake up early to work, tomorrow doing some part time job in the church too. Another busy day.

Stuart's companion

Mom asked to take his pictures. Hehehee

Pic 1: Stuart really like to sleep near my computer, sometimes i really need to chase him away coz he is blocking me from working. And many times, he help to type message in people's msn, and do funny stuff even helping me to off my computer!

Pic 2: He is going to sleep soon, so my computer is his companion...

Pic 3: Finally, he sleep off.

Finally

Streamyx is up after down for 8 days!

Streamyx still down!

Today is exactly 1 week that Streamyx is down. BAD.

Streamyx down!!!

This is the most crazy event. STREAMYX DOWN FOR 6 DAYS ALREADY!!! HOW LONG MORE SHOULD I WAIT? I'm blogging at other place now, streamyx still not doing good. This is my worse decision using streamyx as my broadband at home, i have been paying regularly and their service is so BAD. They always have server problem, sometimes 2 days, sometimes 3 days, now, 6 days already!!!! How long more!!! Terrible! I have been calling them daily, even at 3.30am too! When i call them, they will bring me around the world, asking me to do all the troubleshooting and all, by right that is not the problem, problem is at their side. Can't they just admit it and tell me when it can be up again? Bad service!

Inside my car

Pic 1: The meters & special colour

Pic 2: My tiger

Pic 3: The overall look

Belated B'day Treats

Thanks jie for TGIF dinner. I enjoyed it very much.

Pic 1: Me & my god-sis

Pic 2: I had burger and my god-sis had this...

Pic 3: Then i had small cake from my sis too... hahahaa... a belated cake.

I hate you
Even when you are not with me
You make me cry
Even when i drive
You make me sob
Almost everytime u called
Why did God put me
In such position?

I just cried when i'm driving to take my sis from her company. It was really my first time crying while i'm driving. Well, it was a good cry though. Usually when i'm sad i will sure cry it out so that i will feel better but that will be on my bed with my pillow. This time, i can't imagine that i cried while i'm driving, simply because i couldn't stand anymore.

Bout what? Bout the person that i hate very much. Why did he called when i'm taking my nap today? Why did he want to tell me such thing? I really don't like it. I don't like it.

That's why my whole family would not take up house phone when it rings, simply because we don't want to talk to him.

I really hate him. Lord, help me, help me... I can't be like this! Lord, help. Help me to forgive, my dad.